Author: Alyx Gorman
Friday, 8 August 2008
In scary news for the magazine industry, September’s US Vogue has shrunk by fifty pages since last year. Talk about a crash diet – thin may be in for models, but when it comes to magazines losing pages means losing ads, which translates to losing money. Vogue’s dramatic weight loss is not the only bad omen for the humble fashion magazine. Across the Western world, and especially Australia, fashion titles have been floundering, with distribution figures falling at a rate of knots. There are two theories on why Vogue trimmed down, the first suggests the economic downturn is to blame and that Vogue – like everyone else – will just have to tighten its belt for a while. The other theory is not so optimistic: many see magazines as a dying art form, with the internet playing Video to their Radio Star. We hope they’re wrong, because looking at photoshoots on our laptops in the bathtub has never seemed like a good idea to us.
Last week we made a bit of a mistake with the street style, we credited the shots to Dan Thawley. We’d actually taken our own pictures that week. While we’d love to have Dan’s photos in the mag every week, sometimes it just isn’t possible – but that doesn’t mean we can pretend he took photos he didn’t! To see more of Dan’s terrific work (he’s a much better photographer than us) visit danthescout.com. Sorry Dan!
If you’re thinking about hitting the waves anytime soon, SIMA (Surf Industry Manufacturing Awards) suggests that you do it in Hurley. The Hurley Advantage series of boardshorts were unanimously voted the best boardshorts of 2008. This is thanks to some hi-tech fabrication that make Hurley Advantage boardies super stretchy, light and more resistant to water absorption. “Here at Hurley, we surf. So naturally we wanted something to make the surfing lifestyle that much more enjoyable,” said Ryan Hurley, founder of the surfwear label. “We were tired of being restricted by our equipment. I don’t want a rash, I want to be light as a feather…” Hurley even say their advantage series will make you a better surfer – of course for that to happen you need to be able to surf in the first place. For stockists contact: 1300 139 719.
After years worth of geeky petitions, Nike have finally given their
followers some fanservice with the release of a limited edition pair of hyperdunks based on – wait for it – the shoes Marty McFly wore in Back to the Future II. The shoes aren’t an exact replica, but they are heavily inspired by the original pair, and have ‘2015’ written across the tongue. The sneakers are obscenely limited edition and are already on Ebay for well over $2000. Personally, we think Nike should have held out until 2015 to make the shoes. It’s only a few years away!
Popular boutique Bracewell has just stepped up a notch in the style stakes with the opening of a hip new concept store: Penny Arcade. The name was found hanging on a huge sign – originally created for Luna Park – which also provided some design inspiration. The result is an eclectic, colourful space with an old meets new atmosphere. Located in Surry Hills’ Foster Street, the new space also comes with the promise of greater things to come, with Bracewell’s owner even hinting at an exhibition area somewhere down the line. As well as signature and limited edition Bracewell clothing, the boutique will stock basics, designer denim and some vintage pieces sourced from North America. Plus, it caters for boys and girls, which makes it a great place to drop into on a shopping date.
Find the new store at 15 Foster St, Surry Hills.
It started out innocuously enough – while flicking through a swimwear shoot my friend and I got to wondering about the hair-down-there state of your average model. Our conclusion was a definite ‘bald as a badger’. After all, nothing can ruin a photo faster than telltale curls winding their way underneath the crotch region of a sheer, pretty frock. All fine and dandy, until my concluding remark: “See, they have to do it professionally, so it doesn’t ruin the clothes. They aren’t like normal girls.” My friend looked aghast – “What do you mean not normal-”
It turns out What’s Happening To Me- was wrong. When you start to grow hair in strange new places, it’s not a natural, normal part of your development. Apparently pubic hair is not a mark of womanhood – not a sacred, fluffy triangle to be cherished. Actually, it’s gross like unshaved armpits or matted dreadlocks. Any woman with more than a square inch of cooch covering is downright unhygienic. Somewhere along the line, I’d missed out on this memo. No wonder my boyfriend doesn’t love me anymore.
Don’t get me wrong, it’s not like I’ve never trimmed my garden-where-the-wild-roses-grow. Summertime has always meant a bit of bikini-line topiary, I just never felt the need to turn my map of Tasmania into a slender little Frasers Island.
Just to make sure I got the message straight, I did a quick survey of male and female friends. One field-player reported never having seen a pretty-pube in his life – leaving me wondering what happened to the old “if there’s grass on the pitch, lets play cricket” chestnut. Female friends unanimously declared that their lingerie lady locks needed trimming, tweezing and waxing more often than their eyebrows, up’dos and toes combined. The only furry boxes these babes were toting were made by Luella.
Not wanting to miss the trend entirely, I asked my friends how they acquired their hot new looks. The preferred process of elimination by far was a trip to the waxing parlour. It turns out it’s not uncommon for women to fork out between $65-100 a month on painful and humiliating defoliating. Gentlemen, hands up who’d happily pay a stranger to spread your legs, pour hot wax on you delicates and rip… a stranger whose sign doesn’t include a red light- I thought as much.
Well-heeled gal-pals opted for laser and electrolysis over bi-monthly visits to the salon, which seemed like a good option at first. But riddle me this – if fashion moves in cycles, what will you do when shaggy comes back into style- As far as I’m aware they are yet to invent an itch-free merkin.
With waxing prohibitively pricey (and ouchy) and other options worryingly long-lasting. I was left with one final choice to sculpt my brash bojingle. But, as I held my Lady-Bic in my trembling hand, I realised that dragging a naked razor across my tender mound of Venus would quite literally give me goosebumps.
Frozen with fear, I could only come to one conclusion. There’s nothing wrong with my short and curlies. Apart from keeping my muffin toasty, they’re also the only perfect ringlets I’m ever likely to have.
In the seventies a thick, lush bush was considered complementary to female attractiveness. I say it’s time for a revival.